My husband and I are stuck in a cycle of cheating and revenge

Dear Roe,

My husband and I have been married for 20 years. Eight years after we married, he started an emotional affair with my friend. I found out about it and had him cut all ties. He promised to comply. I got very depressed but wanted to take revenge on him. I had a physical affair myself with three single men at work but cut all ties with them after a particular point (once with every man) as I thought I didn’t want this leading into sex. They all understood and there was no further contact.

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